Self-Help: Survivors of Child Abuse

Most of our Genre Talk posts have covered reading for pleasure, and the types of books that we enjoy reading; but there are darker times in every person's life, when we need help, when we require assistance. Self-help books can be instrumental in providing assistance and support at a time when it is absolutely crucial, in a format that feels non-judgemental and confidential. For further help, I would recommend finding a qualified mental health professional (therapist, counselor, psychologist). In an emergency situation, there are many crisis hotlines that operate 24 hours a day every day of the year. Here in Montgomery County, Tri-County Mental Health operates a 24/7 hotline at 1-800-659-6994.



Child abuse and neglect are widespread problems. According to the National Child Abuse and Neglect Data System, approximately 899,000 children were abused or neglected in 2005. We see the most extreme cases of abuse in the news-- children starved, locked in cages, or beaten regularly; but the majority of abused children simply grew up in unstable homes, where trust and empathy were lacking and they were emotionally abused or neglected. Many children are not even aware that they have been abused, until they reach adulthood and find themselves struggling with chronic emotional and psychological problems. Their issues can range from difficulties with anger, struggling to trust others, and low self-esteem to disorders such as depression, social anxiety, co-dependence, eating disorders, and alcoholism. For many people in this situation, finding peace and balance is a lifelong struggle. The following titles are intended to support those who are adult survivors of child abuse.

-- Bookedupster

Adult Children of Abusive Parents-- Steven Farmer

Farmer gives examples of dysfunctional families, drawn from real-life situations, and details the things that all dysfunctional and abusive families have in common. He also includes exercises for the reader to work through, for recovery. This book is really the best place for any adult survivor of child abuse to start.


Co-Dependent No More-- Melody Beattie

Merriam-Webster Online defines codependency as "a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person is controlled or manipulated by another who is affected with a pathological condition (as an addiction to alcohol or heroin)" Many adults who were abused as children find themselves struggling with co-dependency, since they never learned how to establish appropriate boundaries for themselves and others. This books identifies the hallmarks of co-dependency, provides real-life examples, and offers exercises to assist readers in overcoming this problem.


Alcoholics Anonymous-- Alcoholics Anonymous World Services

Not every survivor of child abuse becomes an alcoholic, but many develop addictive behaviors to cope with emotional pain and turmoil. AA is the original 12-step program, and has been helping people overcome addiction since the late 1930's. This text is often referred to as "The Big Book".


The Ten Habits of Naturally Slim People-- Jill H. Podjasek

So many weight-loss books are the same, filled with lists of what you're "allowed" to eat and what you should never even dream of eating, but this author chooses to focus on health and weight from a psychological perspective. She emphasizes addressing the mental and emotional reasons why people end up unhealthy and overweight, and walks the reader through the process of creating a healthy mind-body connection. I have included this title in this list because eating, like alcohol, is often used to dull the pain of past abuse, and building a healthy relationship with food is part of the road to recovery.


A Child Called It-- Dave Pelzer

Dave Pelzer suffered horribly under the abusive hand of his mother, and was removed from his home at age 12. At that time, his case was considered one of the most extreme cases of child abuse that had been seen in California. In this book, he details his childhood and how he survived. Reading a memoir like this can help remind survivors of child abuse that they are not alone.